A Secret Language- What Are They Saying?!

So much of the time, the issues we face in our daily lives have to do with a simple communication problem. In this case? A toddler language barrier. 

You can pick a bee-ickel. You can pick a cah-car, a geckomobee, a ow gwiyder. You can pick, daddy. Whatchu gonna pick?

Poor Daddy. His face was completely blank. “Uhhhhh….” What did she just say? He had no idea. It didn’t help that she shot it out of her mouth like a cannon, with a supersonic speed to match her enthusiasm! He stared blankly at her, then at me, and Colette soon got frustrated when Daddy wouldn’t promptly “pick a bee-ickel.”

I was sitting nearby and knew exactly what she was saying. It’s from a show she watches called PJ Masks. She was giving Daddy options on which mode of super transportation they should take on their adventure. You can pick a vehicle. You can pick the Catcar, the Gekkomobile, the Owl Glider.. whatcha gonna pick?! Once I told my husband what she said, they were able to continue on with the fun. 

You don’t have to be a parent to know that this sort of thing tends to happen anytime you’re around a kid. It happens around teenagers and Baby Boomers, too! Age gap=language barrier. 

I think this also happens in our Christian walk. In all the excitement of something we’re confident in or passionate about, we speak out and assume that everyone can follow the intent and message behind what we’re saying. We then become discouraged when that desire is not reciprocated and our friends or family don’t “jump on board” or “see where we’re coming from.” 

I’ve seen this happen throughout the course of my life in more ways that I can count and I’ve been on both sides of it. We speak out of turn, because we’re so enamored with a subject, or so eager to help- but it’s seen as arrogant or inconsiderate. We say these things without realizing how difficult it can be for some people to fully understand the message behind our  words.Our intent isn’t met with gratitude. It’s met with speculation. On the other end- the person is trying to figure out what was that supposed to mean? Why would she say that? Why did she do that? How was that supposed to be helpful?  More often than not, the message is lost or completely missed. Or maybe you’ve been on the other side of it. Maybe you’re constantly offended and uncertain of someone’s motive in approaching you or even serving you! We want to be discerning but instead we feel defensive. So what are we to do? 

When Jared or other friends and family can’t quite understand what Colette is trying to say- they go to her Momma. They go to the person who knows her best. Who’s spent the most time with her. In the same way, I believe it’s in our best interest to turn to God when it comes to understanding His children. He is the Father of all mankind. The Creator of all things. It’s not ok to go based on your “gut feeling” about someone. Scripture says that “every man’s way is right in his own eyes; but the Lord weighs the heart.” (Proverbs 21:2) God is truly the only one who understands our heart’s secret language. The people in our lives may view what we say and do as foolishness or gibberish, but God knows our heart and He loves us despite how poorly we sometimes communicate to others. 

So that coworker you’re clashing with? The spouse who isn’t communicating well? The child that’s been in your home 24-7 for the last two months? The family member you’re painfully estranged from? How can you possibly get through another day? 

Even though you feel like you’ll never understand them, God does. He knows you and He knows them better than anyone ever could. He knows their true motives, their hurts, their very inner thoughts and desires. Ask Him to help you understand them more clearly. By seeing that person as a child of God, you can begin asking their Father to plant new insight into your heart so that you can better serve and grow in relationship with them.

Today is my anniversary. 8 years we've been married, and I can tell you that the biggest lesson I'm still learning is how to apply this to my marriage. My husband is the father of my children, my partner in life, my best friend in the world, and my brother in Christ. In moments where there's a language barrier and we stop loving one another the right way or we have a hard time connecting, I have to ask his Father for help. Lord, help me know Your son and love him as You do. Though I drag my feet and get in the way of progress sometimes, God always comes through and I've learned to call on Him always. No one loves my husband more than his Father. Not even me. To truly love someone, we have to be willing to ask for Heavenly help in understanding the secret languages of the heart. 

Pray

‘Lord, you know everything there is to know about me. You perceive every movement of my heart and soul, and you understand my every thought before it even enters my mind. You are so intimately aware of me, Lord. You read my heart like an open book and you know all the words I’m about to speak before I even start a sentence! You know every step I will take before my journey even begins. .' Psalm 139: 1-4 TPT

Reflect

1. What relationships in your life suffer from a language barrier? How so?

1. In the relationships you wrote about above, do you see that person as a child of God? How has this devotional helped you to change that perspective? 

1. Are there times in which you’ve been hurt because of a misunderstanding? Do you think you can trust God to begin working to heal and reconcile that relationship? 

1. Are you someone that’s easily offended? Can you truly know someone else’s motive or intent? Why or why not? 

Do Something

• The next time you find yourself rolling your eyes at someone or becoming agitated, try asking God “Help me to see them as You see them.” 
• Write a letter to someone you have offended and tell them your intent. Ask them to forgive you for any grievance you may have caused them. 
• Realize that you will not be able to please or justify yourself to everyone. When you feel like you can’t change someone’s mind- pray Psalm 26:1-3 and know that you are justified in your Father’s love. 
• Read/Pray Psalm 139:1-4 each day this week and ask God to bring about change in your heart toward others. Ask for His help in making your “secret language” more decodable to others, so that His name may be glorified through you! 
• Read through the verses in the section below and jot down any new insight the Lord may be showing you through His word. 

Further Reading

'How can I know all the sins lurking in my heart? Cleanse me from these hidden faults. Keep your servant from deliberate sins! Don’t let them control me. Then I will be free of guilt and innocent of great sin. May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing to you, O Lord , my rock and my redeemer.'
-Psalms 19:12-14 

'Put me on trial, Lord , and cross-examine me. Test my motives and my heart. Declare me innocent, O Lord , for I have acted with integrity; I have trusted in the Lord without wavering. For I am always aware of your unfailing love, and I have lived according to your truth.'- Psalms 26:1-3

'Work at living in peace with everyone, and work at living a holy life, for those who are not holy will not see the Lord. Look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many. '- Hebrews 12:14-15


Listen 

   Known by Tauren Wells (Lyric Video) 

Known by Audrey Assad  

Who You Say I Am by Hillsong Worship (Live/Lyric Video)

Short Fuse

911, What’s your emergency? 

There’s a bomb in my house!

Did you say a bomb?

Yes! A bomb!!!

Please try and stay calm and describe to me what you see, ma’am.

It’s about 5’6”, it has brown hair, blue eyes, and a short fuse. 

Help is on the way. 

I sure hope so. Everyone in my house is on edge. This particular bomb has so many triggers, no one knows where to walk, how loud they can speak, and there’s no timer. It could go off at any second. Sad to say, the 5’6” explosive is none other than myself. There’s a bomb in my house, alright. And it’s me. 

I stub my toe on the coffee table at least twice a week and it takes every ounce of restraint not to say the expletive that comes to mind. Cursing isn’t really the problem anymore. I sort of conquered that by not watching that much television. (Surprisingly easy fix, though I do have my moments). The real problem runs a little deeper. 

I’m angry all the time. Bottled up and waiting to burst. I have wonderfully joyful moments that liken themselves to a scene from Marry Poppins, but at times, they end so quickly and my adventurous Super Mommy-Thoughtful-Wife persona is thwarted by the latest inconvenience to my day. I think I hide it well, but maybe I don’t. Maybe I’m harsh and desensitized to the way I come across to my husband. Maybe my daughter is picking up on my behaviors more than I realize. There’s nothing I want more than to be able to let things roll off my back. Instead, they stick like a knife in my side. Scripture says that sensible people control their temper; they earn respect by overlooking wrongs Proverbs 19:11. I wish I was this person more often. In the midst of every argument or disgruntled encounter- I long for nothing more than to feel the calming peace of Jesus filtering everything I think and say. I’ve trained my brain to do as much, but my heart won’t follow. 

Friends, it’s hard to type this out. I feel Satan saying “you’re such a phony.” Sometimes I believe what he’s saying- but I have to remember that my confidence is in Christ. It has nothing to do with me.  What you see on social media and in my day to day life is very much real! There are extremely blissful moments and when my perspective is in the right place, God grants me the eyes to see a bountiful blessing before me. I know He’s with me and residing in my home and reaching for my heart at all times- but how can that be when I feel this way?  This is what I don’t understand and what I’ve been trying to seek answers for this whole week. If God is within me- why do I have such a quick temper? Why the short fuse? 

No sense in blaming cycles of past relationships or family. At the root of all this anger there’s me. The bomb. What makes it tick? How do we defuse it? So many questions and so little time before it goes off again. This devotional is practical and short so that if you’re out there and you’re like me- we can start to get to work. If you feel this way- don’t hesitate to reach out. God made us to be instruments of peace, not weapons of war. 

The only true way to experience that peace is to have a cathartic release that comes only when I run to the Father and tell Him once more. “I’m sorry and I’m trying so hard to be better.” God is dealing with me in a huge way this week. He’s not dealing with me by using “His mighty wrath”. He’s dealing with me by reminding me of His love. When you put God’s love up against even the gravest of offenses, you’re brought to your knees. His love should bring me to repentance, and that’s what it’s doing. 

Thank heavens that when I’m my biggest disappointment, He remains faithful. He remains kind. He remains all the things I’m trying so hard to be. Let’s tap into that this week. Let’s lean into Him for the things we can’t seem to change about ourselves.

Reflect

There are 4 major factors in finding the root of my anger. 

Fatigue         Deprivation             Stress             Pride

1. My prayer is that through this exercise, you can identify some of the things that are needing to be released into the hands of God. 

Fatigue- List the things in your life that you’re tired of/from. The things that really keep you from embracing life.

Deprivation- What seems to be missing from your life? Time? Creative outlet? Community? 

Stress- What causes you the most anxiety/fear/stress? How can you see God working in that situation?

Pride- What part of you is puffed up? What are you thinking you “deserve” that you’re not getting? 

2. Out of all of these, which one serves as the biggest trigger for you? How can you focus on battling that this week? 

      3. When you’re most angry, how do you react? How does it affect your family and those around you? How do you feel afterwards? 

       4. Tim Keller defines righteous anger as “Energy aroused in defense of something good and released against something evil.” Based on this, would you say your anger is righteous or selfish? Is it in defense of God and good or is it in defense of yourself and your desires? 

      5. Scripture tells us that “Fools vent anger but the wise quietly hold it back.” Prov 29:11 

How do you relate to this passage? What would be a safe environment to vent your anger? 

Further Reading 

In order to combat anger- we have to seek joy. Below are some scriptures pertaining to both so we can stare down the problem, see its negative impact, and fight it off with the Joy of the Lord! 

• A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare. Proverbs 15:1 

• Better to be patient than powerful; better to have self-control than to conquer a city. Proverbs 16:22 

(I may be in a place of power over someone, but I’m not in a place of control.) 

• 'And “don’t sin by letting anger control you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil.'- Ephesians 4:26-27 (Anger, again, sets us in a position where we are out of control.) 

• You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires. So get rid of all the filth and evil in your lives, and humbly accept the word God has planted in your hearts, for it has the power to save your souls- James 1: 19-21

How can I find my joy when I’ve lost it? 

• We find joy in trusting what we can’t see. 1 Peter 1:8  

• We will know joy when we remain in God’s love and obey Him. John 15:9-11 

• We ASK for it. Simple as that. We have a conversation and ask in His name. John 16:24

• By recognizing that GOD made the day. We can have joy in that. Psalm 118:24

• Align your heart to the realization that pain is temporary. Psalm 30:5

• Come home to the promises of God. Psalm 126:1-6

• Understanding that trials are evidence of new growth and eventual completion in Christ! James 1:2-4

Do Something 

• These are some amazing conversations on the subject of anger. Listen to them in your free time. 

The Root of Sinful Anger from Desiring God Ministries

If God is so Happy, Why Does He Seem so Bad-Tempered? from Desiring God Ministries

Tim Keller on Anger

•  Read through the scriptures in the Further Reading section and pick some of the ones that you feel will be most helpful this week. 

 Pray

After having read scripture and answering the reflection questions, pray this prayer and ask God to fully embody you in the days and weeks to come. Come back to this scripture when you’re feeling that anger creep back. 

(Taken and modified for prayer from Ephesians 4:23-32 TPT) 

Father, today is the day that I want to be made new by every revelation that you’ve given me. I want to be transformed as I embrace the glorious Christ-within as my new life and live in union with You! For You have re-created me all over again and in Your perfect righteousness, and I now belong to You in the realm of true holiness. Help me discard every form of dishonesty and lying so that I can be known as one who always speaks the truth, for we all belong to one another. Don’t let the passion of my emotions lead me to sin! Don’t let anger control me or be fuel for revenge, not for even a day. Don’t give the slanderous accuser, the Devil, an opportunity to manipulate me! Never let ugle or hateful words come from my mouth, but instead let my words become beautiful gifts that encourage others; let me speak words of grace to help them. The Holy Spirit of God has sealed me in Jesus Christ until I experience the fullness of my salvation. May I never grieve the Spirit of God or take for granted his holy influence in my life. Help me to lay aside bitter words, temper tantrums, revenge, profanity, and insults. Instead, help me to be kind and affectionate toward others. Haven’t you graciously forgiven me? Help me graciously forgive others in the depths of Christ’s love.

7 Prayers of Release by Bob Hostetler

Listen

https://youtu.be/iKz5DuiQ3ag

Short fuse

Gotta short fuse my Lord

Short fuse

Gotta short fuse my Lord

I can’t seem to keep it up, all of this love, and my mind’s playin’ tricks like I’m tripped on drugs

Reading every word you wrote, can’t stay afloat, got a heart Peter but I’m stuck in the boat

I’m angry all the time, and I love you all the time. 

I don’t know how this heart of mine is gettin’ by. 

I’ve got a good heart but this mouth keeps runnin’

Can’t get a handle

And if you're filled with Love, when is mine gonna come in? 

I need a candle

To light up the world 

Instead of blowing it up

I need Your Love

Cause I got a short fuse, short fuse My Lord. 

Short fuse, Gotta short fuse my Lord

The Made-Me Bunch: The Involuntary and Accidental Mentors

Remember when you were a kid and you had a birthday party at your house? Your favorite friends would start rolling in, carrying gifts, wide-eyed with excitement and anticipation for what was to come.  It was this mutual elation where one of you squeals,  “I’m in your house!” and the other is internally screaming “You’re in my house!” There was no real reason for it. Just a normal birthday party with cake, ice cream, and some lame goodie bags. But you invited them, and they came. It was an unforgettable feeling.  

That’s about how I felt when I decided to write this devotional. After sending out a simple message to some of the people that had impacted my life over the years, pictures and messages started flooding in. It enabled me to catch up with people I hadn’t directly spoken to in years! This beautiful sense of connection was happening in such a real form that as I sat on my couch messaging back, I felt like my entire house was filling up with all of  my favorite people! The troubles I had been facing regarding loneliness and the side effects of quarantine slipped away with each message I received. I can’t describe it any further except to say that it was like I invited them to come back into my life for this little party I was throwing…. and they showed up. 

In fact, they are the subject of this week’s devotional. The unsung heroes. The people that have shaped us, wrecked us, held us, and tossed us. The Involuntary and Accidental Mentors. Or as I like to call them- The MadeMe Bunch.

Mentorship is something that occurs throughout our entire lives whether we allow it or not. A mentor is someone who guides or advises and is considered to be “trustworthy and experienced”. Most of you reading this have either been blessed to have had a mentor in your life or perhaps you’ve been the one to advise and guide some pupils of your own somewhere along the way. This week, we’re going to evaluate all kinds of mentors, but first lets go ahead and label the one we’re all thinking of. 

The Huggable Healers

This is the person you think of when someone says “who is your mentor?” It’s who I thought of the other night when Jared and I were answering a question in the nightly devotional we read together. It’s the person that’s probably older than you. Perhaps they’ve “been down that road before” and serve as someone you confide in when you have “unforgivable things” to talk about. When you can’t pay your rent, when your marriage is in shambles, or when you’ve started to pick up that bad habit again- you go to this person. They fill the spaces of your heart that your parents and other family members can’t fill. It’s a supernatural fit. God dwells in that relationship and you feel His presence every time this person has you over to chat on their couch or drink coffee on their porch. Sometimes they speak life into your situation or sometimes they just listen and let you figure it out on your own. Never speaking out of turn. Always waiting for God to direct them. They feel like home…. no. They feel like heaven. 

I’ve already lost some of you. “Kari, I’ve never had that and I’ve certainly never been that for someone else.”

Don’t tune out just yet. You’re going to find yourself in here soon and I pray you take a moment to see how God is and will continue to use you and the people in your path to further His kingdom. 

What qualifies someone to be a mentor?

Let’s look at who Jesus chose. He didn’t grab guys off the street at random. He was selective in choosing this band of undistinguished individuals with typical day-to-day problems. Intentionally choosing this blend of misfits to further the message of His Father. Incidentally, all throughout scripture, the disciples miss the mark. Hanging onto exclusivity and pushing aside any idea that didn’t meet their agenda regarding The Messiah. Jesus had intended to use them in ways that they never would have imagined, and Jesus continued to use them despite how many times they’d get it wrong.

If God is so selective in who He chooses, then how can you accidentally mentor someone? 

Easy. 

You stop looking for followers and you start following. 

In doing so, you find that you leave a trail of incidental inspiration unbeknownst to you but very memorable in the eyes of others and your Creator. 

After the Resurrection, Jesus is giving his followers instructions on how to carry on His work on earth. The bible says that even though they could clearly see him, some of the disciples still doubted. 

“And Jesus came and said to them, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”- Matthew 28:16-20 ESV

“Observe”, Jesus says. Teach them to “observe” all that He has commanded. That blew my mind when I read it. When it comes to mentorship, a lot of times there’s no formality. You don’t sign up for it. You don’t get to control who's watching. It can be humbling and frightening all at the same time. No one’s alerting you to mind your tongue or watch your temper. There isn’t a light that blinks green when it’s time to be generous or forgiving. No applause sign telling you to be grateful and give praise. I’ve felt for a long time now that there’s an array of people in my life that I’ve been watching LIVE and they haven’t a clue that I’m even tuning in. It’s time we take a look at some of the ways that God uses us as His ambassadors and mentors here on earth. 

The Involuntary and Accidental Mentors

The Mirrors

These may be the people you avoid at first. If you’re feeling good about your walk with the Lord and this person comes in and tests or challenges you in some way, you don't want any part of it. These god-sends have been the ones who have held a mirror to my face and made me look. It’s been their experience of me that led me toward change. People that I have hurt, misunderstood, or abandoned. Still finding it in their hearts to extend grace time and give me the benefit of the doubt even when I didn’t think I needed it. They’re brave enough to hurt you. A friend of mine from college once told me that I had cut her down with my sarcasm and flippant jokes on more than one occasion. She told me that she felt like we were friends more because she was afraid of me. It cut deep. I needed someone to say that to me. I changed for the better, though I still struggle with making others the brunt of my jokes. 

The mirror doesn’t always reveal ugly though, does it? Some mirroring mentors show strength and potential where we see frailty and uselessness. When we diminish God’s presence or purpose in our lives, these people hold up that mirror, wipe off the fog, find ways around the cracks, and say,  “I see you and I like what I see.” 

Through these encounters,  I’ve learned this: if you can’t look at yourself in the mirror- you can’t reflect the light within you. 

The Electricians 

My mom had a firecracker of a friend named Charla whose southern drawl made you feel like you were getting a hug around the neck or a kiss on the cheek each time she spoke. She’d always say “Oh, Janie!” And literally brush off any negative thought my Mom has about herself or her situation. A skinny blonde with kinky 90’s hair, bedazzled denim everything,  and the most decorative scrunchies I’ve ever seen. She was the pastor’s daughter but what I remember most about her is that she was clearly the Daughter of the King. Some people just know how to walk right in and turn on all the lights. There you are, laying in your bed with darkness, depression, or heavy clouds of doubt. They barge in, pull back the curtains, and show you that even the rainy days are praiseworthy. She was that person for me. Like Mary Poppins, her mere presence offered hope and excitement to my family. In later years, the friendship she shared with my mother led me to pursue women and friendships that showed God’s light as bright as hers did. I’ve been fortunate to sit on people’s beds, giggle into the late evenings, hold their hands, pray with them and have them pray over me. Charla might have known the secrets of my mother’s life and the things she was struggling with, but I’m sure she had no idea how she helped me with mine. All she did was walk in and turn on the lights.. 

The ReWrites 

We proclaim a lot of non-negotiables in our lives. Things that God never intended us to say or feel. “I’ll never let a man tell me what to do”, “I’m not going to treat my kids the way I was treated”, “No one is going to stop me from doing what I want”. The ReWrites find a way to change the narrative of our internal stories. Watching them in action changes the way you see the world. I had a young adult/college pastor that was this towering lovable father figure to so many of us. The way he spoke about his wife and his sons made me realize that not all men were disengaged or domineering. He spoke openly about his struggles and his shortcomings. His stubborn spats with his wife and how “stupid” he was in college :) His rise to God’s call was both inspirational and eye-opening for me. I thought, if this man could do it, I’m open to rewriting my facts page on the subject of men. 

Other ReWrites sort of creep into view without you realizing it. You pass judgment and label them at first glance, but soon you find yourself admitting you were wrong. They love you for no reason. It makes you uncomfortable but you keep coming back. Like a stray cat. Don’t touch me, but keep feeding me. I want more of this. Your heart begins to change and God uses them to further your compassion for others as well as your trust in Him. 

The Ones that Walk Away 

You have to be one of the greatest followers of Christ to leave behind someone like me. An unsettling statement, sure- but it’s true. I've been known to practically worship the ground you walk on if you give me the time of day. Left unchecked, I have an extremely possessive nature and at my most unhealthy state- I can become clingy and demanding. The most influential mentors in my life are brave souls who have set clear boundaries for me. Even Jesus set boundaries with his clingy disciple, Peter saying “get behind me Satan!” Peter wanted to do everything for Jesus, with Jesus, in Jesus name, and I’m sure if there was a cardboard cut-out of Jesus, He would have had it. On his boat. The boat would have been named King Jesus. Yet time and time again, Jesus set forth clear boundaries for Peter, loved Him fiercely, and ultimately left Him. 

The Ones that Walk Away can have a dismissive effect if you’re not careful to see God’s work in the time you had with them. Seasonal Saints, they are. It takes a wise person to know when their time is up. When you're no longer seeking Jesus as fervently as you’re seeking this mentor- it’s time for them to go. I’ve known several people in my life that had to “pull the plug” on me and rightfully so! It was done in love and though I didn’t see it at the time, I do now and I thank God they did. Sometimes we become the object of someone’s faith. Jesus says “deny yourselves and follow Me.” Leaving someone behind takes you out of the picture and allows room for their attention to return to Christ, if they allow it. 

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You may read this and think “this is really more of a list of influencers. Not mentors.” but you’d be misjudging the amount of time I’ve spent with these people. Maybe we haven’t been in the same room. Maybe we haven’t even spoken over the phone or via text/email. However, I’ve sat at the foot of these conversations and interactions for decades now. Re-evaluating my life over and over again because of something they said or did. Somehow, their accidental mentorship has become a large part of who I am. Woven into the fiber of my being as if God knitted it Himself. (Psalm 139:13,16)

You’ve done one if not all of these things at some point. 

• Confessed hurt
• Given a compliment
• Turned the lights on
• Shared your struggles 
• Let someone go

Believe it, friend. God has used you.  

The last story I’ll share is one about an Upperclassman my sophomore year of High School. I had a crush on her younger brother but never told anyone. Typical. She and I were in athletics and had a theatre class together. When things got shuffled around in my home-life, I had to go and live in a neighboring town with my sweet aunt and uncle. So that I could continue to come to that High School, my uncle drove back and forth twice a day. 

Tears well up as I type this because it’s something that seems so insignificant but it changed the course of my life forever. The Upperclassman offered for me to come hang out at her house after school until my uncle could come and pick me up. At this time, my life was painfully unstable and though I was surrounded by people trying to pick up the pieces for me, I felt cast aside and utterly abandoned. She had zero obligation to me. Yet- her abundance of joy and generosity filled my heart for years to come. In a time when I felt like I was being pushed off on other people, she opened her arms and embraced me. One of the first times I felt Jesus in the flesh and I’m blessed to say that many more followed. She was most certainly a ReWrite. I got out my internal narrative and made a note: “ People are still good.” 

With any luck, this country will soon be on the mend and we’ll all journey back into The Land of the Living.
What incidental inspiration are you going to be leaving behind in your household? Who’s going to be looking to you in the future? What co-worker is missing their “christian friend” without you even realizing it? I pray right now that God begins to remind you of His Great Commission in your life. None of these people I’ve mentioned went out of their way to show me anything. They were just following His lead. You were meant to do the same. Through your acts of kindness, your honesty, vulnerability, and bravery- He will use you mightily.  Just by being you. By walking your path and keeping your eyes on Him. 

Pray

A Prayer of thanksgiving is in order for this week. Thank God for raising up people in your life that have served as accidental or intentional mentors to you. Thank God for the opportunities you’ve had to lead others to Him. Ask Him to show you how you can be a better ambassador for His Kingdom. 

Reflect

• Do you think of yourself as a mentor? Why or why not? How has reading this changed your perspective?

• Which type(s) of mentor have you been? Which type(s) of mentor are most influential to you? Why?

• In the devotional, I write “I’ve sat at the foot of these conversations and interactions for decades now. Re-evaluating my life over and over again because of something they said or did.” What things come to mind when you read that? 

• Do you seek counsel when you need it? Why or Why Not? 

• Write down the names of some people that come to mind when you read the verses below. 

Proverbs 27:9 “The heartfelt counsel of a friend is as sweet as perfume and incense.”

Colossians 3:16 Let the message about Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom he gives. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts.

Reach out to these people and tell them how you feel. The best encouragement often comes from those that we’ve traveled with along our journey, even more so when we get to revisit those places we went together. 

Do Something

• Write a letter/email someone who has mentored you intentionally. 
• Write a letter/email someone who has left you with incidental inspiration:) 
• Think about the people in your life who may be going through a hard time. Call on someone to see how they’re doing. 
• The next time you see someone do something that “bears fruit”, let them know that you see Jesus shining through them. 
• Be a better human. So much of what we do each day is self-serving. Think of some ways that you can deny yourself and jot them down on a sticky note. Put it in your car or on your bathroom mirror. 

Further Reading

• Deuteronomy 31:8- Whatever we do, we aren’t doing it alone. 
• Hebrews 13:20-21, Ephesians 2:10- We are God’s handiwork and He’s already prepared us for good things
• Colossians 3:17- Whatever we do should bring glory to Him alone
• John 13:35, 15:8- We are known to be disciples by our Love and our Fruit. 
• Mark 8:34- To follow Christ is to deny one’s self. 

Have a mentor; Be a mentor (the biblical model of mentoring) by Lifeway Staff
https://www.lifeway.com/en/articles/biblical-model-of-mentoring

4 Stages of Biblical Mentoring. A great article on different stages of mentoring with follow-up discussion questions for you and your family/friends. https://www.pursuegod.org/4-stages-of-biblical-mentoring/

Listen            

The song Pour Me Out by Brandon Lake speaks volumes to this idea of mentorship and it’s exactly what our nation needs right now. 

Make me a vessel of your peace
Where there is war let fighting cease
All that divides us, come reconcile us
Make me a vessel of your peace

Make me a vessel of your love
Where there is hatred, break it up
All creeds and colors, bind us together
Make me a vessel of your love

Pour me out, Pour me out, Pour me out
Wherever I am, wherever I go

Make me a vessel of your hope
Where dreams are dead, come wake them up
A new horizon, I feel it rising
Make me a vessel of your hope

Pour me out, Pour me out, Pour me out
Wherever I am, wherever I go

Live Worship

Lyric Video

As always, this devotional is also available via audio on my See Good Things Podcast 

How a Cupcake Broke My Heart: A Lesson on Serving

I didn’t think a cupcake could do that.

Colette has been without her friends and most family for over a month now. Covid hit right after her birthday, ruining a lot of our plans for her. Not a unique story in the world today. Understanding her heart and trying to meet her needs each and every day hasn’t been easy. Though I’m a big part of the picture, there are a lot of colors missing and her world often seems bleak. I was never meant to do this alone and I was never meant to be somebody’s everything. Yet- day after day, I’m home. She’s home. Isolation from friends and family has begun to take its toll on us.

There’s a scripture that has found its way onto many walls of Christian households. You can find it at your local Hobby Lobby (if only it were open). “But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord”- Joshua 24:15. How we go about serving the Lord in our homes is sometimes very different from the way we serve Him on the outside. In my own home, I am extremely “others-minded”. But outside the house, I’m afraid to be. I’ve presented ideas for “social distancing” hangouts with others and it just hasn't happened. Others have extended ideas to me and I’m the one not able to make it happen. Scheduling conflicts or fear of the unknown has kept so many of us away from one another. So how can I have my household “serve the Lord” in a time like this? I’ve got a three year old and a baby at home!

We decided it would be a good idea to make some cupcakes, write some cards, and do a “drive by drop”. We spent all of Thursday prepping. Cola had a blast making the cupcakes and we were so proud to deliver them the next day! I used it as a lesson on generosity and told her “just because we can’t play with people doesn’t mean we can’t show them how much we love them.” I’d soon find out that teaching her this message was easier said than done.

We drove to the first house and it was all I could do to keep her from running up and hugging her friend. I caught her and held her back to respect the 6-foot rule. Her little chest was pumping and she was brimming with hope and excitement- only to be held back and reminded “we just tell them we love them and miss them. Remember, baby? We can’t touch them right now.”

The next house we went to, the same thing happened. They opened the door and Colette forgot about the rules and almost went in before I caught her. She turned to me and gave me this startled look that said “oh, sorry mommy.” But she was so confused. And it hurt me. It hurt me that she had to hold back. We gave them the cupcakes and note, chatted a little, and headed back to our car. The other person in the house was finishing a walk and we met her on the road (staying 6 feet apart). Colette bragged about how big she was getting and we had a lovely time talking with the lady before getting in the car again.

I could tell that despite the nice outside “hangout”, my daughter was beginning to pull back from the joy she started out with on our Cupcake Excursion. I heard her let out a deep sigh from her car seat. She was gazing out the window when I looked back. “What’s wrong?” I asked.

“I just really wish I could have a cupcake.”

“We’ll have our cupcake soon.” I told her.

It was true. I had saved one for her to have after lunch- but I knew that her meaning ran deeper than just a cupcake. It broke my heart.

I didn’t think a cupcake could do that. But it did.

“But I want one now, Mommy.”

“Well who did we make those cupcakes for?”

“Me?”

“No baby. Who did we make them for?”

“Everyone.”

Her realization that the delivering of cupcakes wasn’t about her was also the message that I needed to hear. Truth is- I wasn’t having a great time delivering these cupcakes either. I was sad inside. Aching, really. Some people didn’t get to come to the door and some people weren’t home when we dropped off. I wanted to see them so badly. I couldn’t hug anyone. I couldn’t stay for long periods of time and let our kids run out in the yard together. I thought - this is a huge let down when it was meant to be uplifting! What in the world?!

You see- on a normal basis, my needs are always met in my service of others. So the question during Covid becomes- “Will I still serve God if my needs aren’t being met?”

Grocery store clerks are now serving customers without the normal “how are you? How’s it going? Find everything you need?” They’re afraid to ask these questions because the answers aren’t always uplifting.

Medical personnel on the front lines are being met with aggression over policies that they didn’t create. My best friend is about to go into labor any minute now and she’s told me her nurses and doctors apologize over and over again during her appointments because of the increased precautions that they’re having to take. Police officers are having to combat rumors about their intentions for a routine stop. “Why are you stopping me? Is it because I’m out of my house? I’m an essential worker!” No…. it’s because you were speeding, crazy.

I get a video for our church sermon on Saturday night and we watch on Sunday morning. My pastor is without his congregation. His congregation is without their friends and family. Yet he’s still up there, staring into a camera, and offering hope to God’s people.

The police officer is still protecting the city.
The nurses and doctors are still delivering babies.
Truck drivers and grocery store workers are spending endless hours meeting demands of a stay-at-home population.

They’re definitely not doing it for the paycheck. They’re doing it for the whole. Serving themselves away.

As for me and my household? We will too. We will serve the Lord no matter what it costs us. No matter how uncomfortable it is to meet with people over videochat. No matter how hard it is to see someone and not embrace them. No matter how much it hurts. Like my pastor said this Sunday and many Sundays before since this all started: “We Can Do Hard Things.”

“I’m not built to stay home all the time.” I’ve said this. And while it feels true, it can’t be. The God who made me, equipped me for every purpose He has for me. I will grow into a servant who can give without receiving. I can develop new ways of thinking when it comes to having an “escape”. I may turn to scripture or prayer more than when the world was still in motion. I’m stuck at home, but He’s still on the throne. His work is my work and I don’t believe He’s done yet.


Reflect

• How is God asking You to serve Him? How have you said Yes? How have you said No?
• What part of Quarantine has kept you in grim spirits? What part affects you the most?
• How have you been reaching out to others during this time? Is it painful for you? Why or why not?

Do Something

• Leave some baked goods or offer to bring someone dinner. Leave a note and tell them how much you miss them.
• Plan to see people in a safe environment. On the porch, 6 feet away!
• That person that’s been bugging you to see them or drop by? Find a way to connect with them that glorifies God and keeps you safe.
• Insert yourself in this scripture this week and say it over and over again when you feel darkness creeping back in. Better yet- think of someone you know is hurting! Pray this over them by putting their name in the parentheses.

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts (me) in all my affliction, so that (I) may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which (I) am comforted by God.” 2 Corinthians‬ ‭1:3-4‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Listen

U by 10,000 Fathers feat Aaron Keys

Live Video 

Lyric Video

Further Reading

Feel free to insert yourself in all of these scriptures. The living and breathing word of God is written so that you may believe every word! Hold fast to its truths, dear friends.

“Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. If anyone serves me, he must follow me; and where I am, there will my servant be also. If anyone serves me, the Father will honor him.” John‬ ‭12:25-26‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all.” Psalm‬ ‭34:17-19‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“Whoever serves, as one who serves by the strength that God supplies—in order that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ. To him belong glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen.” ‭‭1 Peter‬ ‭4:11‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.” Galatians‬ ‭5:13‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality.”
Romans‬ ‭12:10-13‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“Give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you." Luke‬ ‭6:38‬ ‭ESV‬‬